This is the big fish.
Your mind is the mountain before you. Get out of your way and it’ll drop off like a stone, because at the end of the day – fat loss is very very simple.
First, some required reading to really get this part handled:
Why You Will Never Reach Your Goals
“Every time I see you you’re leaner. What are you doing? I haven’t seen you in class for a month..” says the doctor in my old CrossFit group.
“Dude, you’re disappearing! How much weight did you lose?” high fives my Jiu Jitsu instructor, the most Brazillian guy you’ll ever meet.
“I’m down 30 lbs now. I have to buy new clothes. People keep coming up to me telling me I look great and asking what I’ve been doing!”
“This is sweet! I overheard my sister say to my mom ‘Don’t tell him I said this, but he’s starting to look incredible’ and now she’s asking me for advice!”
“This is happening so fast I’m just going to wear suspenders under my jacket for the winter and buy new pants come spring.”
It’s an amazing feeling hearing statements like these directed at myself, clients, friends and family members who have all made profound changes to their body in record time.
An even more amazing realization is what would have happened otherwise.
As I said before:
In the space of 6 years I lost at least 40 lbs 3 times.
If I hadn’t become obsessed with this early on, I’d probably weigh in around 300lbs now.
Often times I forget, but that’s a massive deviation that would have wrecked my life and I’m thrilled that I can pass this on to you.
If you’re 20+ lbs overweight and this post doesn’t give you a kick in the ass and a shot of motivation to alter the fact, you’ll be hard pressed to change anything and you’re probably perfectly content watching your favorite reruns of Modern Family surrounded by empty styrofoam containers for the rest of your life.
We both know you’re better than that though.
I joined my high school swim team on a whim and became obsessed with nutrition and exercise. Although my nutrition program was sub par; 6 small meals a day did a better job at making me neurotic than leaning me out – couple hardstyle kettlebell training with spending 5 hours a day in a 65 degree swimming pool and one can get lean pretty quick.
I didn’t have any muscle to show for it though, silly 18 yearold Norski..
A harsh fact of reality is if you’re overweight, you are more likely to be disrespected than any other stereotype.
Having lived on both sides I can say it’s incredibly real how differently people treat you depending on your body. It’s not ‘superficial,’ it’s how our minds work; perception is reality. Look up the Halo Effect if you don’t believe me.
The difference in female attention I received shortly after I stopped looking like a pale, fat, long haired, neck beard slob in cargo shorts and Metallica T-shirts was completely mind blowing.
I’m talking day and night difference.
The way you carry yourself will change completely too. It’s pretty great not feeling like you always have a ketchup stain on your shirt even if you’re rocking a suit.
A friend of mine used to bounce at clubs and decided to do a little social experiment where he put on an eye patch for a full day and observe. Whether it was working the entrance at work or just buying groceries he said people’s reactions to him were 100% different.
He’s a big dude, the kind of guy who could naturally bench over 300lbs before he started lifting seriously – so people always gave him “big guy respect” – but adding the patch turned that respect into fear. People wouldn’t look him in the eye, and were relieved when he was friendly with them.
It’s subconscious and automatic, even if you consciously try to look at a person through your “good heart.” We profile and label people based on their appearance. No matter how well dressed a person is, it’s incredibly hard at first impression to strike people as a person of status if they’re carrying around a significant amount of fat.
Now days it’s frowned upon to downtalk someone for being terminally unemployed, a criminal who refuses to leave their worthless ghetto mentality behind, or someone blatently offensive with something to prove about their stance on sexuality. Yet it’s oddly more acceptable to value someone less for being fat.
Get on the wasteland of what is YouTube’s comment section (I want the old one back dammit) and it’s not uncommon to see a comment thread that looks like this:
“gaaaaay and fake. stahp kthx aight”
“bro, dont say gay lik its bad u fatass. ur prolly livin in ur moms basment n ur cingle 2”
“lolwat ur r a buttfungus! dont hate me cuz im fluffy mang. k but so ya”
It hurts to read, but you get the point. Put yourself in a room full of every stereotyped minority on the planet and if you’re the fat one, you’d be the first to be turned against if the group started fighting.
Lord of the Flies backs that one up quite well.
No you don’t “own your curves;” you’ve grown your own 90’s fanny-pack you can’t open. Looks about as cool too. Every time I see one of those documentaries showing a fat kid devouring KFC as the voice over talks about them “battling weight their entire life” I have to roll my eyes. Walk even a portion of this path successfully and you’ll see what I mean – this isn’t preening a golf course with a pair of safety scissors, it’s being a grownup and taking care of yourself.
Posting trendy internet memes on your Facebook wall condemning “new” behaviors like being “sizist” and promoting “body acceptance” when you’re obviously on the razors edge toward becoming diabetic are just a pathetic way to feel better about something you’re never going to do.
Love yourself, absolutely, so don’t immediately accept defeat because you decided to value ice cream more than self respect. There’s being at home in your own skin, and then there’s denial.
Real self love would have you investing in yourself. Love your body? If you’re a champ about changing the oil on your car every 3,000 miles, you should care even more about the vehicle you can’t trade in when something goes out.
“Your body is the only place you have to live” – Jim Rohn
You might leave McDonalds in your backseat/body. I got a lot happier when I chose to treat mine like a Lamborghini.
Don’t just jump onto a program on a whim and then impulsively leave it just as quickly. That’s pointless.
Don’t go in halfhearted either.
You can be involved with something or you can be committed.
When you eat bacon and eggs for breakfast the chicken was involved, but the pig is committed.
Every time I’ve had success a massive emotional shift happened within me to drive it. This needs to happen for you too.
All decisions are rooted in emotion.
One can get a lot done being fueled by pain, I was a fan myself for a long time.
It isn’t fun living in a negative headspace most of the time, but when I think about it nearly all the drive I’ve had for self education has been rooted in insecurity.
Ask yourself where you’ll be in 5 years if you keep doing what you have been. Unless you know what to look for the food industry is not going to make things easier for you.
– How bad will you miss “the look” from your lover? How discouraging is the new one going to feel?
– You get invited to a pool party. Do you feel self conscious of your body in a swimsuit?
– Are you on the road to having a “mom butt?” Even if you’re a dude?
– Do you already wake up and look down at your paunch roll first thing in the morning?
Your body isn’t getting any younger. Going for a hike with an extra 30-50lbs on your frame makes the adventure a lot harder – I do it sometimes with a backpack and a 24kg kettlebell to keep perspective.
Do something and make it part of you. You’ll gain a lot more than a rockin’ bod and you’ll surely have more depth than that 19 yearold you despise because they look good and eat garbage. Be sure to wave hi to them on your run in 10 years when they drive past with 30lbs on them they never expected.
Fascination on the other hand makes effort worthwhile and makes progress delicious.
Your deepest passion doesn’t feel like work when you’re in the middle of it doesn’t it? In high school I played guitar so much my left hand grew noticeably bigger than my right. Most musicians say they hate practicing, but I’ve enjoyed every second of it because I only play what and when I want to; which is all the time. I always love playing.
Accentuate the positive, fall in love with the journey and you’ll liberate others to take charge of their own.
How awesome would it be if you looked like a statue? If you knew you could cause a chemical change in your lover just by changing in front of them? How great would it be to hang out at the pool and feel excited and proud to show off the investment you’ve made in yourself?
It’ll change your definition of awesome, that’s how.
“Love it or change it” – Doug Castillo
If you don’t see yourself getting jazzed about possibly being mistaken for Rosie O’Donnell someday you owe it to yourself to build a body you’ll actually be proud of owning.
I really care about helping people reach their goals so I’ve done everything I can to make this program as painless as possible, let’s get you on the path to the jeans you wore when you were 17.
The series continues in part III “Quick Start Toolbox.”
Don’t be shy, tell everyone about the body you really want to build in the comments below!